A reporter was sent to interview a woman who had just celebrated her 100th birthday.
“You look remarkably healthy,” said the reporter. “To what do you attribute your good health?”
“I have always used the tried and tested, old-fashioned home remedies whenever I am sick,” she replied. “To improve my digestion I drink beer, in the case of appetite loss I drink white wine, in the case of low blood pressure I drink red wine, in the case of high blood pressure I drink single malt scotch whisky, and when I have a cold I drink schnapps. If I feel a headache coming on I drink a glass or two of Champagne. ”
“When do you drink water?” asked the reporter.
“I’ve never been that sick,” came the reply.