Friday, 9 May 2014

Friday Funny



Three Holy Men and a Bear...

A Catholic Priest, a Baptist Preacher and a Rabbi all served as Chaplains to the students of Northern Michigan University at Marquette in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan.
 
They would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to talk shop.
One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't really all that hard, a real challenge would be to preach to a bear.
 
One thing led to another, and they decided to do an experiment. They would all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to convert it to their religion..
 
Seven days later, they all came together to discuss their experiences.
 
Father Flannery, who had his arm in a sling, was on crutches, and had various bandages on his body and limbs, went first.  'Well,' he said, 'I went into the woods to find me a bear. And when I found him, I began to read to him from the Catechism.
 
Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of God, he became as gentle as a lamb. The Bishop is coming out next week to give him first communion and confirmation.'
 
Reverend Billy Bob the Baptist spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, had one arm and both legs in casts, and had an IV drip. In his best fire-and-brimstone oratory, he exclaimed, 'WELL, brothers, you KNOW that we Baptists don't sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a bear. And then I began to read to my bear from God's HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me.
 
So I took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another until we came to a creek. So I quickly DUNKED him and BAPTIZED his hairy soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle as a lamb. We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus. Hallelujah!
 
The Priest and the Reverend both looked down at the Rabbi, who was lying in a hospital bed. He was in a body cast and traction with IVs and monitors running in and out of him. He was in really bad shape.
 
The Rabbi looked up and said: "Looking back on it, circumcision may not have been the way to start."
 

13 comments:

SARN said...

Seen this before - but it's STILL funny. Happy Friday to you. xxx

Bleubeard and Elizabeth said...

You always make me laugh on Friday!!

fairy thoughts said...

brilliant and i didnt seeit coming either
janet

fairy thoughts said...

brilliant and i didnt seeit coming either
janet

Kim said...

So glad I've learned not to read while drinking...I hadn't heard this...very funny!!

Anne said...

:-) :-) :-) Anne x

Caro said...

Very funny! Not heard that one before. Thanks for the smiles. Caro x (#7)

Nan G said...

Ooh guess not....LOL :) :) :)

Annie said...

Sorry I'm so late calling by this week...I've had an extra day with my munchkins today. :-) Lots and lots of fun and giggles all day.
I've heard this one before but still laughed :-)
Hugs,
Annie x

Helen said...

lol, have heard this before but it's still so funny!

Elizabeth said...

Very funny - not heard it before and didn't see it coming either :) Elizabeth xx

Kyla said...

Brilliant...read this out (was quite impressed with my Baptist impression) and hubby sat there laughing!
Kyla ps...yep am going to the crop..you?

Laura said...

Again, heard it before but still laughing
Thanks for the smile :)