Friday, 18 September 2015

Friday Funny

Confucius Did Not Say: 

Man who wants pretty nurse must be patient.ü
Passionate kiss, like spider web, leads to undoing of fly.
Lady who goes camping with man must beware of evil intent.
Squirrel who runs up woman's leg will not find nuts.
Man who leaps off cliff jumps to conclusion.
Man who runs in front of car gets tired, but man who runs behind car gets exhausted.
Man who eats many prunes get good run for money.
War does not determine who is right; it determines who is left.
Man who fights with wife all day get no piece at night.
It takes many nails to build a crib, but only one screw to fill it.
Man who drives like hell is bound to get there.
Man who stands on toilet is high on pot.
Wise man does not keep sledge hammer and slow computer in same room.
Man who lives in glass house should change clothes in basement.

And, Confucius Did Not Say. . .
"A lion will not cheat on his wife, but a Tiger Wood!"
 
Linking this with my lovely Buddy Annie for Friday Smiles!!Annie

6 comments:

Barb said...

hehehe! I enjoyed reading your Friday Funny. Have a lovely weekend Hettie. Barb.xx

butterfly said...

Very good - lots of lovely word play!
Alison xx

Susanne Vargas said...

Those are really good! Two Friday Funnies today - fun!

Kathleen said...

Brilliant and very clever.

Kath x

Karen Petitt said...

LOL! Hope you get some time to craft. Still going through all of my crafty stuff so in no mood to do anyone else's sadly! I have become a hoarder and I fear that much of it is going to end up in bin or recycling bin! Do you need any Staz On ink pads? I have several that are free to a good home? Just let me know Karen x

Twiglet said...

When we were kids we used to say this one...
Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.
I don't think I understood(then!) .. but it just made us giggle.
Thanks for a few more giggles. x Jo