Friday, 4 July 2014

Friday Funny

Last week, Ethel checked into a motel on her 70th birthday and she was a bit lonely.  She thought, "I'll call one of those men you see advertised in phone books for escorts and sensual massages."

She looked through the phone book, found a full page ad for a guy calling himself Tender Tony - a very handsome man with assorted physical skills flexing in the photo.

He had all the right muscles in all the right places, thick wavy hair, long powerful legs, dazzling smile, six pack abs and she felt quite certain she could bounce a sixpence off his well-oiled butt...  She figured, what the heck, nobody will ever know.  I'll give him a call.

"Good evening, ma'am, how may I help you?

Oh my, he sounded sooo sexy!  Afraid she would lose her nerve if she hesitated, she rushed right in, "Hi, I hear you give a great massage.  I'd like you to come to my motel room and give me one.  No, wait, I should be straight with you.  I'm in town all alone and what I really want is sex.  I want it hot, and I want it now.  Bring imp lements, toys, rubber, leather, whips, everything you've got in your bag of tricks.  We'll go hot and heavy all night - tie me up, cover me in chocolate syrup and whipped cream, anything and everything, I'm ready!!  Now how does that sound?"

He said, "That sounds absolutely fantastic, but you need to press 9 for an outside line."
 

16 comments:

Kathyk said...

OOOPSIE!!! ROFLMAO!

Kathyk

Annie said...

Tears running down my face here Sam....brilliant
Hugs,
Annie x

Twiglet said...

Fell at the first hurdle!! lol x Jo

Robyn Oliver said...

Hi Hettie...laughing my head off, hubby thought it was pretty good too. Happy Friday smile and hugs Robyn

ElizabethR said...

Lol have a fab weekend xxx

Lynn Holland said...

Haha haha thought it was a porn site first of all haha

Caro said...

Too funny! Thanks for the smile. Caro x (#8)

glitterandglue said...

Hubby and I in hysterical laughter here, Hettie. Where DO you find them???
Margaret

MaryH said...

Made me laugh! TFS & Hugs

SARN said...

Ha ha ha . . . . that is hilarious Sam. TFS xxx

Kathleen said...

Fantastic, really LOL here.

Kath x

Bleubeard and Elizabeth said...

I admit I had a wonderful laugh at this one I didn't see coming!! Happy Friday and happy weekend, dear friend.

Judys Fabrications said...

Hahaha...I'm still laughing!

Debs Willis said...

So funny!! Hubby loved the last one about the elderly pilot/lesbian so much he shared with all his work mates. Think this one might go the same way!
Hugs
Debs x

Carol L said...

Bwahahaha! thanks for the great chuckle :)

Princess Judy Palmer said...

Oooooooooooo WEEeeeeeeeee!